I don't like playing dolly...

I don't know the words to describe the dramatic play of small children with figurines, action figures, animals and miniature people, the safe space created by children to work out the everyday problems and confusion they experience between characters of their own creation. It is in my opinion that this is the best kind of play done between children, rather than children and adults, but that may be because I do not enjoy it. As an educator who is generally working with multiple children in a similar developmental range, I model this play with young learners rather than engage. I'll set up the farm, and play a few times with the children modelling the animals pretending to eat, parents caring for babies, animals exploring and helping each other as I slowly draw myself back from the play, reducing my volume and presence, prompting instead of directing until I can sit and watch.

But what do you do, in a pandemic, when playdates are infrequent, children are encouraged to give space and all of a sudden you are their primary playmate?

What do you do when you know that your child enjoys the play, that it is important and beneficial, but you do not enjoy it?

MY FAVOURITE STRATEGIES

TIMER: A friend recently told me that she puts a timer on for dramatic play with her child. That she evaluates her capacity and what else needs to be done, and then offers her child between 5-30 minutes of play that will end when the timer goes off. This is my new favourite strategy!

GOING ON A BEAR HUNT: This song/story is one of my all time favourites. While you can stick with the main story, that your small characters are going on a bear hunt, you can also expand the story to include knowledge, or ideas that you and your child are interested in. It could be an underwater adventure where you are going on a treasure hunt and encounter different sea creatures, or explore engineering by Going on a Tool hunt through a building, imagining elevator shafts and ducts as you try different tools looking for the right one to fix a leaky faucet. These are some of my interests that I've combined with the kiddos play to keep myself stimulated. I will often add conversations about climate change and focus on solving natural disasters to move away from the kiddos desire to use superpowers (power over rather than power with) to solve all challenges we encounter. I love super powers, but I want to build divergent thinking (being able to see many solutions to a problem) rather than the use of power over to solve problems.

USE THE PLOT FROM A LOVED BOOK: Retelling stories is wonderful for memory development, try using a loved book that you and your child have read many times together (or a book you really like and are willing to read a few times) in which you know the name of the characters and the general plot. Choose figurines and act out the book, you can read the book before, or just have it lying nearby for reference the first time, and then as the storyline becomes familiar start to have fun with it. Try challenging your child's character with different situations; like what if they had gone here instead of there, or what if your character wanted to do something different than the original story? Adding conflict and safe risk will allow your child to explore situations and big feelings they are just learning to deal with (fear, anxiety, worry), while adding dimension to your play. The new ideas, plots, insights, and challenges you explore together will inspire your child in solo play and with others. The different ways you resolve the problems, cope with feelings, and motivate yourselves to prevail will resonate in other parts of their lives. I love Indiana Jones and Lara Croft characters, or Dora and Diego style stories with adventures and puzzles, but finding what stimulates you (think about what genres of books or movies you enjoy) will help you bring authentic enjoyment to your play with your child (a little sarcasm is fun too).